A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him.
The nun, surprised by the question, politely declines and gets off at the next stop. When the bus starts again, the bus driver says to the hippie, "If you want, I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you."
The hippie of course says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery to pray to the lord. "If you went dressed in robes and some glowing powder," says the bus driver, "You could tell her you were God and command her to have sex with you."
The hippie decides to try this out. That Tuesday, he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun. Right on schedule, the nun shows up. While she's in the middle of praying, the hippie walks out from hiding, in robes and glowing with a mask of god. "I am God, I have heard your prayers and I will answer them but you must have sex with me first," he says.
The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity. The hippie agrees to this and quickly sets about having sex with the nun.
After the hippie finishes, he rips off his mask and shouts out, "Ha ha, I'm the hippie! "
The nun replies by whipping off her mask and shouting, "Ha ha, I'm the bus driver!"
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
At a local college, there was a dance.
A guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, "In America, we call this a hug". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too."
A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, "In America, we call this a kiss". She replies, "Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too."
Towards the end of the night, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to have sex with her, and says, "In America, we call this a grass sandwich". She says, "Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but we usually put more meat in it."
Owned...
Nah. Owned is just owned. Pwned is perfectly owned.
|: It's just a misspelling of "owned". Like "teh" is of "the".
Anyhow, lol'd at the first one.
Second one was okay.
I dont actually laugh out loud. In fact my face is like a brick most times. On the rare occasion I will say "lol". When I do you've made mr laugh.
I'm going to call you Sad Panda from now on.
Or Nick. Either one works I guess.
Nicks request approved.
Good. I like it. It has a certain ring to it.
That is going to throw me off so much now.
Anyywwaaayyy..
Uhmmmm you're confused? 'Cuse me? I'm the one with the new name here..
I don't get the second one :(
Meat is a slang word for *****. |:
Edit: lol @ correct term censor.
I knew that, but I still don't get it.
The dude has a small -whoopy-. She needs more -whoopy-, or meat, to make her -whoopy-.
Quote from: Insomnom on February 28, 2011, 09:14:41 PM
|: It's just a misspelling of "owned". Like "teh" is of "the".
Are you refering that 'owned' is a mispelling of 'pwned', or that 'pwned' is a mispelling of 'owned'?
Quote from: ratman3 on March 01, 2011, 05:23:51 PM
Quote from: Insomnom on February 28, 2011, 09:14:41 PM
|: It's just a misspelling of "owned". Like "teh" is of "the".
Are you refering that 'owned' is a mispelling of 'pwned', or that 'pwned' is a mispelling of 'owned'?
I don't know.
Lets take a closer look at my post, shall we!?
QuoteIt's just a misspelling of "owned"
Hm. Tricky one, but we can tackle this!
From this we can deduct that "it's" is referring to the subject at hand (specifically the "it" in "it is").
And I certainly wouldn't compare the spelling of one word to itself!
Quote"owned" is just a misspelling of "owned"
doesn't make much sense, you see?
So from this, we can deduct (by using context clues within the post I quoted and my post together) that I was speaking of "pwned" being the misspelling.
Which, these days, is an intentional one. =)
But now it isn't an intentional misspelling, it is a real word with a real definition.
Sweden ain't a dum country... >:(
Aha, I love the first one. ;D