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Jokes & Riddles

Started by IvyX, January 17, 2010, 12:39:05 AM

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IvyX

Hi, this is Ivy X. I wanted to make a post about Jokes & Riddles, so if you have an EXTREMELY HILARIOUS joke or riddle, please post the joke/riddle.

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|          \|  |_____|   Bad Jokes please.

First joke of the post! P.S.- Jokes include Yo Mamma jokes.

Yo mamma so poor, she only had 2 TV channels, ON and OFF

IvyX

Riddle- There was a plane with people on it, and crashed onto a high mountain. Where do you bury the survivors?

Answer: Bury survivors? Are you nuts?

IvyX

Joke- What do you call white people pushing a car up a hill?
     A: White power.
Joke- What do you call black people pushing a car up a hill?
     A: Black power.
Joke- What do you call mexican people pushing a car up a hill?
     A: Grand Theft Auto.

IvyX

Joke:

There was a little boy named Timmy, and one day, he said to his mother, "Mommy! I need to go poop!" And so he did. When he came back, his mother told him, "Timmy, next time you need to go, say Mommy! I need to whisper!" So at 3:00 AM in the morning, Timmy went to his parent's room and said to his mother, "Mommy! I need to go whisper!" The mother replied, "Go whisper into Daddy's ear."

Banjo Hick

Yo mama so ginger her crotch caught on fire! F*cking Owned!!!!

IvyX

Joke- Yo momma so fat, she couldn't even jump to a conclusion.
Joke- Yo momma so ugly, she tried to enter the ugly contest, and the contestants said, "No professionals."

Banjo Hick

One night a king and a queen entered a castle. Three days later three people left. Who left?

A knight, king, and queen.

Zack

Okay. A priest and a rabbi walk into...oh wait...that's inappropriate.

IvyX

There was a redneck that was in a bar, an then a large asian man came in and slammed the redneck down. The redneck said, "What was that?!" The asian man said, "That was a karate chop from Korea." Several minutes later, the asian man slams the redneck down again. The redneck says, "What was that?" The asian man said, "That was a judo chop from Japan." The redneck was furious, and left. An hour later, the redneck comes back and slams the asian man down, making the asian man faint. The redneck says to the bartender, "Tell him that was a crow bar from K-Mart."

That was a HILARIOUS joke for my friends, and I bet you will at least chuckle too.

wouter